Happy Birthday

Our tour guide Bao-Hong said: “Today is someone’s birthday and we are going to have a Birthday Party.” We all sung happy birthday songs for this happy fella.  After I sung the Chinese happy birthday song, AC asked me: “Is this truly happy?” I said: “Why not? I know that we are one step closer to our grave yard but we should not be sad!” I know that birthdays mark us one year less in our life. But please think in this way, we are one year closer to reborn/transmigration. In Buddhism we believe our body is just like a piece of clothing that we have put on and the day reborn/ transmigration means we can pick new clothes to wear. Although we don’t know what kind of clothes we can have but there is always a hope. Hope for a better one!

So happy birthday to him! Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday to everyone!

Please note: To be able to pick a nice beautiful clothe, we have to:

Avoid do all the evil acts;

Should do all the good and kind acts and

Purify our mind.

Good luck to all!

Superstitious

There are many superstitious things that Buddhist believes in. Things that they can collect merits such as burning a lot of incenses, asking or monk’s blessing, getting merits by visiting Buddhist holy sites and so forth. To my understanding, burn incense is to remind us of our virtue. Do we have any virtue? Fruit offer is to remind us whether we have cultivated our self or not? Flower offer is to remind us phenomenon is impermanent. There won’t be any merit to collect if we don’t use these to reflect on ourselves.

During the trip to Sri Lanka, our tour guide BH offered some incenses to me. I said no thank you. I have my own incense, right inside me to offer to the Buddha and Bodhisattvas. She also gave me a plate of flowers so that I could offer it to the Buddha at the Tooth temple. She insisted that I must have this. I could not go in with empty hands. Sigh. Someone in the group asked: “How come some plates have lotus flowers and my plate has none?” I asked: “Does it matter?” Does a lotus flower awaken you to enlightenment?

Our group seemed to enjoy the blessings from the monks. They requested the Thai monks in Thailand to bless them. When we were at the Sri Dalada Maligawa Tooth temple at Kandy, they got the blessing from various head monks. AC asked why I didn’t ask for blessing. I said thank you very much, I have my own blessing. I don’t dare to take up anyone’s blessing from now on. I have learnt my lesson back in the year 2013 India trip. 

I walked around the Bodhi tree at the Kelaniya temple. AC asked: “Why did you walk around the tree? Are you asking for any merit?” I said: “No, I am not asking any merit. I walk around the tree because I see this tree as I see Buddha. I see Buddha’s teachings. I see impermanence. I see a great man who stroke for liberation not for himself but for all human beings. I pay respect to my great teacher.” Why on earth would I ask for merit in this way?

Buddha taught us in The Kalama sutta:
Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it.
Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many.
Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books.
Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.
Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.

Wat Yannawa (Relics temple)

This temple houses many golden monk statues and various monks’ relics including Buddha’s top 10 disciples such as Ananda and Maha Kassapa. I burst into tears when I saw not one but many monks who practised and liberated from this Samsara. Their great effort moved me; I prostrated with my gratitude to the patriarchs from all over the world who showed us the way; who carried the light of Wisdom and passed it onto us.

Let me pay my gratitude
To all patriarchs around the world
Your ascetic, self-cultivation, preach Dharma
Vowed to leave us
Your body relics
To show us the right path
Keep the sangha in order
All these virtues are endless merit
Please let me show my respect
With all my heart
Prostrate in front of you
Thanks for your great effort!

My troubles

On the trip to Sri Lanka, one of the group members knew palmistry. She read my palms and said: “Poor you! You have a lot of sickness showing on your palm. But you have an easy life.” I totally agree with what she said. Since I was born I had Alpha Thalassemia. I have Tuberculosis. I had my bowel cancer 3 years ago. I have lots of cysts in my body. I broke my collar bones when I was six and now it is still aching. These are my physical sickness. My other sicknesses are my mental sickness. I have loads of negative feelings such as anger, greed, hatred, jealousy, ego, envy and so forth. I have to admit I am a person full of diseases.

She also said: “Your life is very short. You need to practise hard on Buddhism to be able to have a longer life.” I laughed out loud. AC over heard her comment and said: “I would like to swap my life with you. My palms show I have long life.” I said: “No way! Your life is yours and my life is mine. I don’t mind dying young. What am I going to do with such a long life?” My sickness is mine and I wouldn’t want anyone to have it.

On 2nd of September, we went to see a cultural show at Kandy. On the way back to our hotel, Viji our tour guide pointed to the lake and said: “Sri Lankan believes if you throw food over your head to feed the fishes in this lake, then all your troubles will eaten away by these fishes.” Thus our other tour guide Bao Hong bought popcorns. The group happily threw the popcorn over their head and wished all their troubles to go away. There was one bag left and Bao Hong offered it to me. I was reluctant but she insisted. Hence I stood on the bridge and made a wish. I wished all the fishes will be liberated from this samsara. I then threw all the popcorn over my head. Accidentally they landed on AC’s head. AC cried out and I laughed. It was the funniest thing I’ve never seen. I told him he is now having all my troubles. What a beautiful Sri Lankan tale! I wish someone can take my troubles away. But on second thought without all these negativity, how do I know life is impermanent? How would I know life is within our breath? No way will I give my best friends away to someone or anyone.

A mango leaf (Chỉ là hình thức mà thôi!)

Outside Wat U Phai Rat Bamrung, there is a huge Bodhi tree. Someone said this Bodhi tree was a sapling of the Bodhi tree from Sri Lanka. I picked up a leaf from the ground and started to analyse it. The leaf shape was not the same as the one from Bodh Gaya. My face looked puzzle. AC saw and said: “This tree is the same species as the one in Bodh Gaya.” I asked: “How come the leaf is so big?” AC asked: “What if Buddha sat under a mango tree instead of this tree? What is the different between this leaf and a mango leaf? ” This is so true. Bodhi leaf or mango leaf it is just a leaf. Nothing more than a leaf and yet I was attached to the shape and size of the Bodhi leaf. My old habit of differentiation was telling me this is not the same tree. So what if this is not the same. Leaf is leaf and why do we place such an important to this particular leaf. Dog knows this number 7th mind is working. (Don’t worry if you don’t understand what is mean by number 7th mind.) AC was like a mirror; he showed me a reflection of my old habit inside me.

At Anuradhapura, we visited a Bodhi Tree which was brought from India by King Asoka’s daughter, the nun Sanghamittra. Our group leader requested a sapling to plant in Australia. The head of the Sri Maha Bodhi temple said we have to send in a request to be approved by the council. I told him I have the Bodhi seeds from Bodh Gaya. He said: “No, it’s not the original. If we grow from seed then it will become another tree.” Original! What is original? I thought I got STUCK in the leaf and now someone got STUCK in the tree. This is not only a tree but ORIGINAL tree.

Dream

When Thay Tâm Tuận mentioned the word “Dream”, my mind went through lot of things. I thought about my parents, my brothers and sisters, my jobs, my money, my cars, my house, my friends, my hatred, my travel, my Dharma learning, my teachers, my right, my wrong, my ego and my life. All these that I’ve attached through my life is just like a dream and yet I am enjoying being in this dream. A momentary enjoyment causes my transmigration. Is this worth it?

What is my father? What is my mother?

What is my husband? What are my children?

What are my brothers? What are my sisters?

What is love? What is affection?

What is success? What is failure?

What is being born? What is dying?

What is sickness? What is old aged?

What is cause? What is effect?

What is right? What is wrong?

What is a car? What is a house?

What is power? What is privilege?

What is “I”? What is “You”?

What are the things that I can hold on to?

When I am alive, I attach to these things

But when I die, what can I take with me?

Only the karmic force will come with me

Like the shadow

Stand by me wandering in this Samsara.

I have awakened at this moment but I don’t know how long I will fall into this “Dream” again. 

Pilgrimage

There are two types of pilgrimage: physical and mental. Physical: we visit the sacred/holy sites. Mental: we use the holy sites to reflect on our inner self.

There are holy sites all over the world. If we are Buddhist, we visit India, Myanmar, Bhutan, Sri Lanka, China, Thailand, Lao, Cambodia, Vietnam, Japan, Korea and etc…. Each country has its own holy sites. When we visit these sites we should respect the local’s history and their belief. We should not have hatred towards a particular site. Pilgrimage is for both physical and mental. If the site offends us then we just simply walk away. You may not like it but others may find it fascinating. There is no need to make a big fuss and criticise it. This only shows our ego and we cannot tolerate others. When I am in a church or other temple, I respect their God(s). I respect their rituals and I respect their followers. Even the site offends us, we still can learn much from it if we use a calm and serene mind to look at things. Every site is pure-land.

In 2007 India pilgrimage trip I visited a Hindu cave temple, a monk asked me to touch the Lingam stone. I didn’t know what it is. Everyone walked in the temple will touch this stone, so I did. The monk saw and laughed. I looked closely to the stone and realise it is a male sex organ. It was disgusting! I watched all the people around me and felt pity for them. I know why we are in this samsara because we dwell in the craving of sex. I didn’t swear at that monk who took me to this cave temple. I didn’t even shown any sight of unhappiness, but from now on I have to be careful not to touch anything that people ask me to.

Site Pilgrimage
All holy sites
I respect, I admire, I accept
No prejudge, no hatred, no expectation
Use a serene mind to see
There is no good or bad, no right or wrong
Happy to accept each site


Inner Pilgrimage
Each step I follow
Buddhas, Bodhisattvas and the respectful Sanghas
As my models to follow
Their loving kindness and compassion, wisdom, joy, no attachment
Their vows for sentient beings
I can only reflect
Lessen my greed, hatred, ignorance and ego
Live in the joy of Chan.

The Art of Aging

On the way back from my recent trip to Sri Lanka, a group of women went to a shopping mall to look for things which could make them look younger and beautiful. The monk asked me whether I will be like them, trying to refine their skin to look younger. I asked myself ‘do  I really looking that old?’. I quickly found a mirror in the shop and put my face against the mirror. Hmm… I do have few wrinkles and my skin might be dehydrated from 3 weeks under a strong sun. But so what? I quickly put on a smile. The reflection in the mirror tells me this old woman looks not bad at all. Why can’t I accept being old? Why do I have to spend money to make me look younger than my age? What is wrong being old?

When I arrived home, my eldest sister who can be my mum by age said: “Gee! You are getting old. You have to use facial products so you have fewer wrinkles.” Sigh! My own sister now tells me that I look old. I spotted a Nutrimatics booklet on the table which has a title “Make skin act up to 10 years younger within 24 hours”. Now I am in a dilemma whether I should or I should not pay $79 for this magic cream. I laugh out loud. How tempting! I won’t let this trick me.

Few years ago my brother in law was in his midlife crisis. I couldn’t comprehend his sadness.  Now I understand his fear of being old, being unwanted, being unattractive and being useless eventually. I introduced him to do a Vipassana course and he came out with no attachment to this aging problem. My hubby is now going through this stage. He madly wants to match with his son’s standard in clothes. He is yearning to have assurance that he is still attractive. When he was young, he would hardly spend time in front of a mirror looking at himself but now he is doing this quite often. Luckily he is now into his new hobbies that divert his attention.

Generally I am a happy person. I am happy with what I have and want nothing more. I have many hobbies such as gardening, meditating, writing, reading, day dreaming on a couch, walking, traveling, volunteering and drinking my cup of tea. I watch my health closely. I accept being old is part of the deal in having this body. This is a normal process that everyone has to go through unless you die young. So being old is nothing to be ashamed of! I love my old look. I am proud of being old. That means I have lived my life. I might look old but my inner self is just only 16. Hehehe.

To sum it up, the secret of getting old gracefully is to believe in yourself. You need to be happy with what you have. This includes with your old body, your old look and feel.

While typing this article, my hubby came to show me his photo and said: “How come I look so old?” I laugh and reassured him he is looking fine.

The Art of Simple

A young girl said to me: “I have noticed you only wear brown or black.” I haven’t told her I do have other colours. I truly don’t bother to buy clothes to match with whatever is in my wardrobe. I don’t like shopping. Not only do I wear simple clothes, I also eat simply. If I am at home by myself, I just whip up a cup of raw vegetable and fruit juice for a meal. I can sleep in anywhere because I am not attached to my own bed.  I can sleep while I am sitting or standing. Someone told me that I might have a hard time to share a room with someone during my recent trip. Now three weeks were over and we had so much fun. I had no problem with anyone because I am a simple person and can adapt to anyone’s need. This has been shown in my ex-working life. I can adapt in any working environment whether it was a hospital, teaching or government agency. I provided simple solutions through my 26 years working life. They were easy to implement and effective. I don’t like complex thinking; just make it simple and concise. I am a person who cannot think like Asians do. They can go round and round like a merry go round. This is far too much for me. I am a direct person. You can tell me straight if I am wrong, there is no need to dance in the bush.

The Art of Simple is very simple. You just need to live simple and think simple. Live simple means living in the moment, not yesterday nor tomorrow.

The Art of Giving

Prayer for Generosity (St. Ignatius of Loyola)
Lord, teach me to be generous.
Teach me to serve you as you deserve;
to give and not to count the cost,
to fight and not to heed the wounds,
to toil and not to seek for rest,
to labor and not to ask for reward,
save that of knowing that I do your will.

This prayer is from my children’s school who teaches them generosity. When my daughter was a little girl, she used to give out all her best things to others. I used to teach her: “Every man for himself and the devil takes the hindmost. (人不為己，天誅地滅)” In 1998, I attended my girl’s first mass at Northwood St Ignatius church. Father Bowler said: “We are born for others.” This statement stroke right into my head which made me realized I was wrong all the way. I told my girl when I picked her up from school. I said: “Mummy is wrong in teaching you this world is only for our-selves. Today what father Bowler said is correct and we should give our hands to others.” From then on we have tried to live by this prayer.

I remember when I was young, there was an occasion that I saw someone approaching my father outside my school. He cried for help. He told my father someone in his family passed away and had no money for the funeral. My father took his money from his wallet, without counting and gave all of it to that man. I asked my father: “Do you know that man?” my father replied: “Vaguely… Why?” I said if he didn’t know that man well, why did he give all his money to him. My father said: “Who would make a joke about their relative’s death to get money?” This image of giving has imprinted in my memory until today. Today I asked my father whether he remembered what he has done. He said: “No, why bother to remember all these things. Life has many important things for us to do and remember.” To him, helping someone is a way of life, nothing really special. My parents used to take us to do charity when we were little. He gave out his time, talent, money, goods and many more to whoever who needed it the most.

We can give not only money but our recommendation, our good advice, our time, our smile, our laughter, our skills, our encouragement, our affection, our blood and even our body part. The main thing for giving is not to count the cost as the prayer teaches us. Once you give then please don’t think how other people use your gift.

The Art of Dancing in the rain

Dancing in the rain

Bucket full of rain

Pouring down

Soaking wet

You and I are dancing in the rain

Rain drips from our hairs

It gets everywhere

The sky is grey

But our smile are shinning bright

Holding your little hands

My two little wet angels

Just dancing

Kicking

Singing out loud

Open our heart

Welcoming this rainfall

Like welcome our downfall

With a smile

Let it wash away

Follow rhythm of the rain

We are swaying and swishing

Through our life

We are dancing in the rain

In the rain

Have you ever danced in the rain?

My children (14 years old and 9 years old) and I danced in a heavy rainfall during a visit in Vietnam. It was unbelievably fun. We danced under the cool raindrops. The area was flooded up to our knees. The local people thought we were crazy. After the dance we went to a vegetarian café to have lunch. We sat down and ordered 3 serves of pho, 1 serve of combination rice and 1 serve of stir-fried noodles. The café owner looked at us, wondering where did these 3 soaking wet, hungry people come from? We gobbled down all these food, wiped our mouth, paid and went back into the heavy rainfall. The owner had this disbelief look on her face. People thought we were wild.

I can tell you dancing in the rain will give you a great experience. Try it one day and you will truly know how wonderful this is.

The Art of Dying

Although I have not experienced death but I can imagine it. I vividly remember back in 2010 before my operation for my bowel cancer. I visited a Buddhist monk a week before the operation. He asked me as followed:

Do I have a will? Do I owe any debt from anyone? Do I have special things (example: say sorry) to say to anyone? Do I have anything that worry/bother me?

I told him I did not have a will but I will write one. I don’t owe anyone money. I could not record I have done anything to make someone upset. Only one thing that I could not let go is my parents which the monk told me to make a vow for them. For my children, I have a good husband who will look after them. Really I have nothing to be attached to and could not let go.

All of the above questions help my mind go calm when facing my own death.  If we are well prepared then we would not be afraid of dying. We must face it, accept it and deal with it. Dying is part of our life and if we know this is a normal process, we can accept it.

Now that I am ready but are my family members ready? We need to let them know our decisions. For example I told my children if I am unconscious or my heart is not responding, I don’t want any electric shock CPR. I have nominated who is my power of attorney and guardianship.

When we are born, death is at the other end waiting for us. So if we know this, we can live our life fully instead of wasting it. Once we have prepared for it to come, we can enjoy every moment of our life. We see each day or each moment is a gift to us so please fill it with glory.

Kalyana Mitra (Thiện tri thức)

A beautiful affinity connected us here

Một duyên lành cho chúng ta gặp nhau đây

I am grateful for your 10 days Dharma teachings
Cảm ơn bạ̣n đã dạ̣y tôi mười ngày Phật Pháp

This is long enough for me to learn
Thời gian đủ dài cho tôi tìm hiểu

Buddha’s teachings are one, not two or three
Phật Pháp là một chẳng phải hai ba.

Neither Mahayana, nor Theravada, nor Vajrayana, nor Thien, nor Pureland
Không phải Đại thừa,chẳng phải Tiểu thừa, không phải Kim Cương thừa , không phải Thiền, cũng chẵng là Tịnh độ.

Bodhi or mango leaf is form. Form is emptiness and emptiness is form
Lá Bồ Đề hay lá xoài chỉ là hình thức. Hình thức là không, không cũng là hình thức.

Five precepts are the basic rules to practise
Năm giới là điều cơ bản để thực hành

The Threefold Training (Sila, Samadhi, Panna) is the way to go
Tam vô lậu học ( Giới, Ðịnh, Tuệ) là con đường tu học

The Four Noble Truths, The Eightfold Paths and the twelve conditions of dependent origination that I should understand and practise
Tứ diệu đế,Bát chánh đạo cùng Thập nḥị nhân duyên là những pháp ta nên hiểu để thực hành

Watch my speech, action and mind base on the law of Karma
Thân khẩu ý theo nhân quả tôi nên gìn giữ.

Final lesson used computer terminology to explain re-incarnation
Luân hồi chuyển kiếp dùng máy tính giải thích là bài học cuối

Trip is over and this affinity is gone
Chuyến đi kết thúc và duyên này là qua

We might not see each other again
Chúng ta có thể không bao giờ gặp nữa

But I know that we both walk on the same Dharma path.
Nhưng tôi biết chúng ta cùng đi trên đường Phật đạo

On this cold spring morning,
Trong buổi sáng lạnh mùa xuân,

You have brought a smile on my face.
Bạn đã mang đến nụ cười trên mặt của tôi.

06/09/2014 Adelaide
(Special thanks to Anh Hue Dung who helped me to correct my Vietnamese grammar!)

The Art of Drinking Tea

Early in the morning while people are asleep, I brewed my first cup of tea. I don’t know how to brew tea like the Japanese. For my cup of tea, it is just normal hot boiled water with tea leaves. I like to observe how the dried tea leaves gradually enlarge as they soak up the water. I enjoy watching the tea leaves flow inside the cup. They go up and down like our life. I don’t know how to do tasseography but I can read when each tea leaf has oozed their essence. It expands, and releases its fragrance and colour into the boiling water. It has offered it’s best to me. How often do we live to our life to the fullest like a tea leaf? We need to reflect!

I watch the steam evaporate from my cup. It forms all sort of shapes and sizes. I feel its warmness. From my tongue, I could feel the sun, the moon, the dew, the rain, the earth, the labour work and the fragrance from the tea. I feel the whole universe in my tea cup. You just don’t know how grateful I am to sit here and enjoy my cup of tea. This is my Pure-Land. I gaze out my window and see the crack of dawn.

The Art of Napping

In this hectic 21st century, who has the time to have an afternoon nap? I am one of the lucky people who can enjoy a power nap after lunch. That is why you need to retire early to be able to relish these nectars.

I remember when I was little after morning session from school, my father used to have a 10-20 minutes nap with me. I hated afternoon nap as I was too energetic at that time. My father put his arm around me and said: “Quick go to sleep then we can go back to school for the afternoon session.” It sounds gross to sleep under your father’s armpit. To me it was awesome.

Nowadays life is full on with team meetings, things that we need to deliver, deadlines to meet and so on. Even during the weekend we have so many things to do such as cleaning up the house, shopping for food and catching up with friends. We have a million of things in our little minds, yet there is no time to relax. People at work who fall asleep at their meeting are laughed at. And when we doze off, we feel guilty.

We don’t know how to enjoy life as my dog does. She is having a nap in the morning after breakfast and after lunch. A dog’s life is much better than a human in this case.

The term siesta is the traditional daytime nap, once popular in Spain. A power nap can be a very powerful tool that keeps us from performing at our best and enjoying our life to the fullest. History has showed and you can search on the internet for more information.

It is simple. We just need to have somewhere to lay our body down (on a lawn, couch, bed, inside your car or carpet), relax and fall into sleep.

The Art of looking at the sky

Lately my hubby got into the hobby of watching the stars. He bought an expensive skywatcher reflector telescope. He is like a chook without head, lost in space. He doesn’t know what he is looking for.

Eight years ago we built our pergolas with a special cubby house on top of it. At that time I asked to have a sliding roof so we could watch the stars up high but I got rejected because it costed too much. Now he washed and repainted the cubby house and wants to make the roof slide. He said he will make it happen. What he wants to get out from gazing at the stars, I don’t really know. I am not sure whether he wants to see the beauty of the planets, moon and stars or he wants to find some answers about his mid-life crisis. All he needs is a planisphere to help him get around.

I love staring into the sky whether it is at night or during day time. My mother used to watch the evening sky with me. She pointed to some of the stars and said: “This is the ruler in the heaven. It rules good and bad. That is the star which tells you the direction when you get lost. Those stars are the cow boy and weave girl, so on and so on.” She also told me the beautiful girl with a rabbit who lives on the moon. Every time I gaze at the sky, I will look for all these stars that my mother told me. She also taught me how to tell the weather by watching the moon and clouds. There are so many stories about the stars and the moon from my mother.

I used to fall into sky fantasies with my son when he was little. We read all the books from his school and local libraries about astronomy. My son was only four at that time and he knew all the planets and their characteristics. I remembered at that time there was an article in the Advertiser about a black hole on a flat plane. He had a great debate with us that black holes could not be flat. He had his own theory. He often told me he would build a spaceship to take me to space, visit some galaxies, may be to Mars but never Jupiter or Venus because its intoxicated with poisonous gasses. There was once at Wilpena Pound, my son and I climbed up to a hill before 5am. We sat on top of the hill with a sleeping bag wrapped around us. We could only hear the wind whispering and a symphony of rippling sounds from the inhabitants of the wilderness. Both of us were gazing at the sky. I told him all the stories that my mother told me about the stars. We went back to our tent after we watched the sunrise. It was one of the most enjoyable moments in my life. Another great time that my family and I had was at Arkaroola. We had a bonfire, roasted marshmallows and hot chocolate. The stars were much brighter at Arkaroola and they seemed so close to the earth. I can’t find the same feeling when I watch the stars in suburban Adelaide.

I don’t like to look at the stars with a pack of people especially with the astronomy club. I like to watch it with my love ones, relaxed and let my imagination run wild. The more I watch the stars the more I feel small. Years ago my GP told me I am a universe. It took me years to realise what he meant by ‘I am myself is a universe’. As I grow older, my interest of watching the stars has phased out but if I go into the wild again then this will be a different story.