Our life is as short as a breath

Our life is as short as a breath

Recently I saw an old woman at the temple pass into unconsciousness in a split second. She looked as normal as could be then suddenly she became unconscious. An ambulance was called and people were all around her. It was scary to watch. I suppose this is what we call impermanence.

My mother was all good until Thursday 20/07/2012 when she had a heart attack. My father told me if that is the end of her that I didn’t need to feel sad because soon or later they have to leave us. My mother was holding my hand at her hospital bed said: “Don’t feel sad if I am going. I have live up to this ripe age and be happy for what is coming.” I totally understand impermanence but was still sad at the thought of her departing.

 Yes, the impermanence is the law of permanence. Things are changing every a split of a second.  Our body and mind never stop changing. We shouldn’t grasp our past. Our past has long gone. Yesterday is no longer belongs to us. It is history. We also shouldn’t grasp onto our future as it has not yet to come. We should live fully, wholeheartedly in our present moment but we should not grasp because it keeps changing. Each moment is a precious moment in our lives. Our lives are as short as a breath therefore we should live fully and wholeheartedly. For when we get lost in thoughts of the past or future, life passes us by.

Past, Present and Future Dim Sum

(Note: Dim Sum is some kind of Chinese refreshment. Sum means mind in Chinese.)

Not sure if you have heard about this zen story, it is about an old woman who was a dim sum seller. One day Deshan Xuanjian (a zen master) came to buy dim sum from this old woman. The old woman asked him what he was carrying. He said: “Diamond sutra commentary!” the old woman said: “Diamond sutra said the past, present and future mind can’t be grasped. What Sum do you want to have for your refreshment?” Deshan Xuanjian couldn’t answer the old woman. The old woman said: “I am sorry. Please go somewhere else to buy your Dim Sum.”

Later Deshan Xuanjian went to study under Longtan Chongxin and enlightened eventually. The old lady’s Zen dim sum had inspired his enlightenment.

The most beautiful sound

At a dim light

I watched my mother’s breath

Up and down her soft body moved

I never consider

Snoring is the most wonderful sound

But tonight

Snoring from her ensured me

She is still alive

I closed my eyes

Meditated on her snoring

I never know

Her snoring is such beautiful sound on earth

To be or not to be a vegetarian

To be or not to be a vegetarian

I really don’t want to write about this but there are people asking me or having a go at me because I am a vegetarian.

Yesterday my workmate, who calls herself as a long term Buddhist (with more than 30 years practise in Buddhism), had a go on me because I am a vegetarian. This is not her first time. This is the Nth time she has done it. She asked me whether I knew there are many enlightened human who are/were not vegetarian. She confronted me and asked me if I knew that although people can be vegetarian but do bad deeds. That being a vegetarian does not make me a good Buddhist. That often vegetarians will suffer from vitamin deficiencies….

On the other hand, my other friend who is also a Buddhist is absolutely baffled at why some monks eat meat whilst others don’t. Does that mean she needs to cook meat to offerings to cater for monks who do eat meat? Some monks say we shouldn’t be attached to being a vegetarian; we should eat what is convenient for us.

I have to make a stand here. Firstly I am vegetarian not because of religion. I was a vegetarian long before I called myself a Buddhist. I am a vegetarian because I don’t want to cause harm to others. I saw a movie clip in the slaughter house and I also read many articles about how people farm their animals. That is the reason I became a vegetarian. I take no precept in this. I eat anything with no face. I make no fuss when I find my food has onion, garlic or leek although I don’t like their smell. Unlike some Buddhists they won’t eat food with this type of vegetable. I am a vegetarian not because I want to be enlightened.

Secondly I am vegetarian because there is choice that I can make. You can say I am attached to this. Whenever I am presented a choice, I will choose vegetables. When there are occasions where people present me with vegetables with meat I will eat the vegetables and leave the meat for others. I make no fuss in this as long as people don’t force me to swallow down the things that I don’t want to swallow. Finally I have been vegetarian for more than ten years and haven’t had any vitamin deficiencies. This also applies to my children.

I know in the Tipitaka, there are some texts regarding with what meat the Buhikku should eat. Here is one of them: Majjhima Nikaya 55.5 The passage reads as follows: "I say that there are three instances in which meat should not be eaten: when it is seen, heard, or suspected that the living being has been slaughtered for the bhikkhu. I say that meat should not be eaten in these three instances. I say that there are three instances in which meat may be eaten: when it is not seen, not heard, and not suspected, that the living being has been slaughtered for the bhikkhu."

We can argue at Buddha’s time, Buddha didn’t say lay/monk/nun couldn’t consume meat. We can say I am not guilty as I do not kill but you are killing the animal indirectly. Why? The reason is because if there is a demand then someone must supply. If we consume meat then there is a demand for meat on the shelf for us to buy. Okay we can say I didn’t ask you to slaughter the animal for me; I didn’t hear when you slaughter the animal and I didn’t see you slaughter the animal. But because we buy it, so someone has needed to slaughter. Someone has to do this dirty job for us because we consume meat.

Why can’t we see this instead of pestering about being vegetarian and the meat issue? If we want to eat meat then accept it and EAT. We don’t need to find excuses and have a go at others. I never have a go on people who eat meat or who are meat lovers. So what if a person’s eating habits is different from us. Being a vegetarian is my personal choice and I don’t need to tell people why I want to be a vegetarian for DOG’s sake. (You may ask why I wrote this article even though I don't want to tell people why I am a vegetarian. The nature of this article is quite contradictory but long over due.)

02/11/2011

人在江湖身不由己

人在江湖身不由己

You can't always do as you like, one has to compromise in this world.

This is load of shit when people say this! My brothers keep using this as an excuse for not doing their duties. Mum was sick last week; she needed people to nurse her by her bedside. I was there 7 nights sleeping on the armchair and yet my own brothers told me “They can’t always do as they like once they have family of their own.” Am I not married? Do I not have children of my own? My children are much younger than anyone of theirs. Do I not have a fulltime job? I needed to ring up my boss to ask for carer’s leave. I had to leave my children home alone. My eldest brother is retired at home; lives next door of my parents’ home but could not even look after mum for a night. This is bullshit!

Whoever says “You can't always do as you like, one has to compromise in this world.” is finding an excuse. An obstacle doesn’t have to stop us. If we face it, accept it, work on it and overcome it. We can find time if we want to. Nothing can stop us if we want to do something, unless we are not willing to do it, we can do it. I compromise in this world and still find my own way to do things I ought to do. Nothing is impossible if we want to do it, we can do it.